Mentoring: A value-add or low-value activity

Mentoring is not a new word or process; for time immemorial, there have been mentors. Most of us would also have had mentors in our lives in schools, college, homes, and work places. For some of us, it worked like “MAGIC”, for others, it was “OK.”

I have often wondered what makes the difference and why two people have opposite experiences. Let us try to list a few of the magical differentiators.

Core of Mentoring

Mentoring is fostering meaningful relationships that facilitate learning and development. It is a collaborative partnership where a more experienced individual, the mentor, shares knowledge, insights, and experiences with a less experienced individual, the mentee.

Differentiator 1: Mentors are not teachers or buddies; they are people one looks up to, admires, and would want to emulate.

Mentors share experiences, offer valuable advice, listen, and may occasionally counsel. The real value that mentors bring to the table is sharing stories, anecdotes, challenging situations they faced, and how they moved ahead. As mentors usually have a longer tenure in the organisation, they play a pivotal role in helping mentees integrate into the culture and values of the organisation.

If the mentor and mentee have built a good relationship, then often the mentee uses this safe space to discuss challenges, career opportunities, stakeholders, etc. Mentors also create opportunities to increase the visibility of the mentee by inviting him/her to important events/meetings.

Differentiator 2:  Mentoring works best when,

– A mentor has no direct reporting relationship with the mentee. While the immediate supervisor does play the role of a mentor, invariably the conversation with a reporting manager can get wedged around tasks, and the opportunity to have wholistic conversations gets marginalised. 

– The mentee has a choice in choosing a mentor.

– The process is unstructured within a structure.

Differentiator 3: Not being mindful of the dysfunctions

– Confusing mentoring with coaching, mentoring is not coaching; it can have elements of coaching but it is not coaching, so skip setting SMART goals and objectives. Ensure that in each interaction, the mentee uses the opportunity to grow. Find creative methodologies to address chosen subjects.

– Taking charge: allow the onus of this relationship to be on the mentee. Encourage the mentee to proactively steer the relationship through communication, setting up meetings, and informing what he/she would like to discuss.

– Time constraints: to avoid this, plan a couple of meetings in advance. Aim for long and short meetings.

– Focusing on feedback and to-do lists: invest in listening, understanding, and helping the mentee to build confidence. The mentor must ensure that the sessions are not monologues and that the mentee has enough space to share insights and perspectives. Mentors give candid, honest feedback when needed.

Organisations that have structured institutionalised mentoring programmes benefit by:

– Spotting talent and grooming the leadership pipeline

– Retention 

– Continuous informal learning channels

In our 25+ years of journey in the leadership and management space, we have set up structured mentoring processes in organisations. Our role has been to prepare the mentor/mentee for internalising the concept, setting clear expectations and boundaries, reviewing and tweaking the process if needed. While the concept of mentoring is of great value, it often falls into the cracks because of a hand holding framework and the expectation that in one cycle it will run like well-oiled machinery. Like any other process, this too takes time to stabilise and becomes a way of life for mentors and mentees.